Navigating Entrepreneurial Growing Pains

Have you ever experienced that phenomenon where you are in a really slow season of your business, begging the Universe to provide you with more opportunities to grow, and then all of a sudden every available opportunity hits at once? You’re so excited for the chance to do business and show off your skills, so you say yes to everything, working yourself to the bone trying to hit all your deadlines on time, but then you finish and need a month or two of rest to recover.

Me too.

Since starting my entrepreneurial journey, I’ve had a hard time enjoying the fruits of all my hard work. I’d spend so much time setting up trying to drum up business without seeing any results. Then all of a sudden, the business opportunities would fly in and I’d be completely overwhelmed. I often felt like a chicken with my head cut off, running around with no sustainable strategy for how to get all this work done without burning out. 

In the years since, I’ve tried many tools to get through these busy seasons without burning out, but the ones that worked the best, that have continued to work for me, are the ones that seem counterintuitive. When I’m in my busiest season, the best thing I can do is slow down and take a breath. Even now, when I’m busier than ever, I struggle to manage my time without taking a moment to pause and reflect.

By pausing, I’m able to create a strategy for this particular busy season that allows me to thrive. Here are a few of the strategies that help me manage the growing pains, both personally and in my business:

1. Identify your vision and mission. All businesses start with a vision, whether it’s a vision of your personal future or the future of your company. When we’re in our busy seasons, we can lose focus of what it is we set out to do when we started our entrepreneurial endeavors. By setting aside time to refocus on the purpose behind our businesses or projects, and what we hope to get out of it, we’re better able to set boundaries and stave off overwhelm. 

2. Create your ideal team. When your business is growing and you’re struggling to meet demand, building a solid team around you is one of the best things you can do to alleviate stress. But great teams are not created accidentally. It takes time, patience, and a want to surround yourself with people you can effectively manage and interact with. That’s why it’s important to work on this when things aren’t busy. But if you haven’t, don’t fall into the trap of not doing it when you need it most! Once your ideal team is assembled, fervent energy manifests and stress dissipates, leaving only creative approaches to handling your growing pains.

3. Learn to delegate. Entrepreneurs and small business owners usually strike out on their own because they want to be their own boss. And when you have spent time working for yourself, doing all the tasks, and only having to hold yourself accountable, you can forget to delegate when things get busy. Look for support based on individual skills and expertise. Take advantage of it, let go of trying to do everything yourself, and the growing pains will be easier to navigate (and you’ll *finally* learn to delegate!).

4. Build strategy and SOPs early on. It’s important to have strategy and standard operating procedures in place prior to, or at least at the beginning of, the busy season to help prevent growing pains from stalling your work. I hired Alex recently, a new and amazing Chief of Staff. It's been a good year since I knew I had to find support to be able to navigate my growing business. So I’d started recording weekly marketing and communications tasks using Loom. When Alex came on board a few weeks ago, she had a (albeit small) library of SOPs to get her going. 

5. Letting go of growth and being okay with it. There’s this pressure in business that makes it seem like every idea, every project, needs to be striving for maximum growth. But what if you don’t want maximum growth? What if you’re content with where your business is and not enjoying the experience of growing pains? It’s okay to sit back and relax into the comfort of where you are right now. Also, a company can be a company of one and be very successful. There’s an amazing book by Paul Jarvis that speaks exactly to that. If staying lean and free of the burden of growth is your goal, I recommend you read it.

Life as an entrepreneur is always exciting. There’s always an opportunity for growth, both personally and professionally. They give you a chance to dig deep and push yourself to identify what systems are working for you, what isn’t necessary for success, and help you see what needs to evolve and what can be let go.

Overwhelmed by too many opportunities?

The five steps above sound easy to some entrepreneurs, but for most they might find it difficult to take that pause. In the past 25 years, I’ve experienced similar issues, both in my own work and in my client’s. This is why I became a certified career and business coach: I wanted my clients to navigate building and growing businesses and projects with ease and flow, and without the overwhelm.

You deserve an opportunity to see your company grow and not feel overwhelmed or stressed. In our coaching sessions, we will dive deep into how to grow your business successfully, your vision and mission for it, and how we can get you there feeling confident and fulfilled.

Schedule your free session!

How Deirdre overcame burnout and started the wellness magazine Self.ly

Deirdre and I initially connected after she signed up for my Free Smart Work™ Challenge. When she did, she was in big career transition, and wanted to start a business to help professionals prevent burnout through self-care. What inspires me most about Deirdre is her never-ending enthusiasm, her incredible creativity, and the passion she has for her project. It’s been a joy working with her, and supporting her in achieving her dream. Here’s how she did it.

What was your big dream, and what inspired you to go after it?

I want to end burnout in the workplace and make workplaces more human so people can be at their creative best. My own experience of burnout, after working myself to exhaustion in my previous fast-paced job, inspired me to understand what had happened to me. 

I wanted to know how I went from energetic, positive, and creative to overwhelmed, and stressed out. This made me understand the need for self-care and wellness in the workplace, and what ultimately led me to create Self.ly – a platform dedicated to the wellbeing of professionals.

Did you always have this dream?

No. It arose out of my own burnout experience, which illustrated to me that the current workplace is not fit for purpose. What happened to me is not an isolated event. Our work environments are not equipped to take the “person” into account, and the needs we have. 

Stress reduction, a sense of purpose, inspiring work… it’s not often there. When it is, it’s not always readily available or it gets counterbalanced by even more pressure to perform. Something has to change. 

What was one of the first things you did to get you started?

I enlisted as coach. I wanted an accountability partner, sounding board and support mechanism as setting up a business is a daunting proposition when you’re emerging from burnout and you’ve lost confidence somewhat.

What were the biggest challenges you faced in working toward achieving your dream?

Mindset – having the positivity, focus and self-belief to translate a wish into a website, an online magazine and an online community. Entrepreneurship is a journey. You start out with passion, and a desire to create change. Even though you “know” things might get tough at times, you’re never fully prepared for when doubt hits, or when the results you’re hoping for are taking longer to manifest. 

That’s why mindset is so important. Staying optimistic and believing in your project, adjusting expectations along the way. 

What do you wish you would have done differently? What would you warn others about?

I underestimated the amount of time things really take. It’s also all-consuming so I had to start practicing what I preach and look at pace and build in regular recovery time; something that’s particularly important when you’re engaged in creative tasks like writing or planning. It’s easy to get sucked into the “work longer, harder, faster” fallacy and burnout. So building in regular breaks and making sure to build connections and talk to like-minded entrepreneurs who are going through the same frustrations and trials has been vital to maintaining momentum.

This notion of overnight success is an urban legend, and very misleading. If you’re starting something new, expect a long and challenging journey. I’ve had to revise my expectations around monetary growth. You have to believe in yourself – believe in your ideas, your abilities, your will and perseverance, and dedication. And that makes you want to live your life your way and not anyone else’s way.

Would you say you’ve achieved your big dream yet?

I’ve done what I set out to do, which is to get my magazine established. I would say I’ll have achieved my goal when I see active change as a result of the magazine and online programs. 

Self.ly was created to really help move the needle when it comes to self-care and burnout prevention in the workplace. I know there’s still a lot of work to do, and for the dream to be complete a paradigm shift needs to happen. We have to redefine work, and make the worker center stage. 

What do you think helped you achieve it?

You were instrumental in allowing me to see a feasible path forward and establishing a framework and milestones for achievable growth. It’s important to speak to someone who has gone through the process and is familiar with it.

The fact that I wanted to create real change also helped. When you’re passionate about something, you can put all your talents and creativity into building it. 

What’s the best advice you have for others who want to follow their big dreams?

Stick with your gut – you have to go at your own pace and listen to your own instincts.

Don’t underestimate the importance of incremental improvements – Rome wasn’t built in a day. Don’t compare yourself with business owners who have been at this for 10 years. You’ll get there at your own pace, in your own time.

More about Deirdre and Self-ly  – https://www.self-ly.com/

Deirdre is the Founder and CEO of Self.ly. The platform is a lifestyle media brand and supportive community dedicated to making self-care simple and accessible for busy executives, entrepreneurs, business leaders and healthcare professionals. An antidote to hustle culture, Self.ly provides the information, tips, latest trends and advice to show you how to avoid burnout and overwhelm and raise your energy, performance and mental health and wellbeing.

Don’t hesitate to get in touch with Deirdre! She loves connecting with people from around the world. You can do so through her website at  https://www.self-ly.com/

Deirdre’s favourite quote is:

Build yourself brick by brick

– Tom Bilieu

Deirdre’s big dream for the world is:

I want to help create mentally and emotionally healthy and human workplaces where individuals can flourish and organisations can prosper.

If you want more inspiring stories, I’ve got great news for you! This story is part of an interview series, you can find all entries here.

Why every freelancer needs self-care (and how to start)

You’ve leaped off the edge of the 9-5 and into the digital nomad or freelance lifestyle – or freedom lifestyle as I like to call it. You went from schedule to no schedule, from many bosses to you being the boss hot sauce. This jump might have been thrilling, but now you’re on the brink of exhaustion, fighting off the stresses and anxiety of the freelance world. 

From working sporadic hours while listening to the news, or watching YouTube and researching for your next client, keeping up with your habits and your time can border on a traffic jam or Titanic level crash. Putting your health and body first can be a struggle when everything else seems important, to the detriment of your work performance. (Perhaps you’re still in the dreaming phase of becoming a freelancer, and want to overcome the career change fear, if this is the case I wrote about that here.)

How to Self-Care as a Freelancer

Freelancing can easily lead to overwhelm, anxiety, loss of sleep, and even burnout. No clients or overwhelmed from too many clients? Exhausted from trying to juggle all of the elements of your freelance job? The list is endless: cold calls, responding to leads, marketing activities, writing and sending out newsletters, social media scheduling, meetings, networking… 

To enjoy the freelance lifestyle you need a schedule, priorities, ways to delegate, and tools and resources to help you navigate the trenches on the daily. Create daily and weekly goals, organize your tasks according to a schedule and use deadlines, both soft and hard ones and, most importantly, self-care all parts of your mind, body, and soul.  

Mind

One of the main elements of freelancing is that you’re working in isolation. It can be difficult to maintain connection with people when you work from home, or a coffee shop. Try not to neglect your family and social life. Isolation, both for freelancers and entrepreneurs in general, is a huge and common challenge. It’s hard to nurture strong relationships when you’re either not in the same location as other people (perhaps after work) or in a slump working from home (can’t seem to get out of those PJs huh?). 

Work is work, and as freelancers it’s easy to get overwhelmed by all the things we have to do or underwhelmed by how slow the process is to get things off the ground. Make sure you prioritize your social support (schedule it if you need to). Work will always be there, but friends and family are important, both during good times and the more challenging ones. Don’t neglect the people around you. Call, text, send an email, check in with your people regularly! 

Apart from a social life try to include some form of mind work into your days: meditate, breathe, reflect, journal. And remember, always make your bed.

Body

Nutrition and physical activity are essential for freelancers. From maintaining a balanced diet, to moods, preventing chronic disease, and boosting positive emotions. You can’t work your best if your body can’t work its best. Often, we don’t take self-care seriously until we experience a serious health setback. Make sure you’re planning your meals and not breaking the bank buying fast food meals. This does twice the damage – processed meals and spending too much money. Why not try a meal planning app like Mealtime, Food planner, or Paprika? Be sure to supplement and balance with lots of natural foods and water, and try to minimize the amount of sugar. Sugar cravings can happen, and it’s a habitual trigger from anxiety, or even from skipping meals or low blood sugar. 

Slow down, take your breaks, go for walks, get off the bus one stop earlier, or sneak in YouTube videos on yoga, or simple at-home exercises (as safely as possible!). The other important thing about self-care is having a good healthcare plan. 

Be proactive and maintain your breaks for the gym, walk outside, eat nutritious food, maintain a healthy diet and get sleep. Don’t procrastinate all day, only to stay up all night to get a gig done. Sleep is one of the most vital things to ensure well-being and mental focus. 

Soul

Whether you’re a freelancer or a digital nomad, self-care is about a nourishing type of discipline (and not the punishing kind). The mind and body like routine and habit, while the soul requires more depth. All it takes is one step, and one plan to get going. Keep distractions at bay. Create a soulful work environment that helps you feel good AND succeed. Know yourself and spend time to reflect about where you are and if you’re heading in the direction you want. You can’t know until you sit quietly and listen to that inner knowing. 

Build self-awareness through stillness. This will help you to know what you tend to do, what your triggers are and how you react to situations. Becoming intimate with yourself like that will help you grow, and reach new heights.

In the end, be realistic and make sure you’re creating healthy boundaries in this new work environment, and say no. 

At first it might feel very tempting to say yes to any and all clients (and that’s okay when you have bills to pay) but do not bend your freelancing values just to accommodate everybody else first, including leads and clients. This might take a toll on your health. 

Be proactive about your freelance self-care. Whether it’s a 10-minute meditation in the morning or turning off all your electronics after 7 pm and taking a bath. 

Freelance self-care always starts with your well-being and the choices you make. Make sure to develop the self-trust necessary for stepping into your own power. In the end, if you’re not feeling well it’s going to be difficult for you to maintain that freelance lifestyle you dreamed of – and that you now finally have.

How to take care of yourself without neglecting your priorities

Back in 2010, when my journey toward dreaming bigger started, one of the first things I learned was how important it is to take care of ourselves. Whatever you want to achieve; making sure the body, mind, and soul achieving it are nourished in a meaningful way is essential to succeed.

As women we’re conditioned to put everyone else first. Many of us are taught to be good, quiet, not too demanding, and certainly not selfish.

We’re expected to do all things without complaining. To bring children into the world, to care for our families, to look gorgeous, to be exemplary daughters, sisters, mothers, wives, and mistresses. In recent times to be wildly successful at our careers and businesses too.

The result is an epidemic of over-extension and overwork. Of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and dieting. Of trying to live big lives while keeping ourselves small, exhausted, trying to do it all.

It doesn’t work.

You cannot dream big while trying to please everyone. You cannot see the possibility in everything when the only way you believe you can be is perfect (read white, thin, and young). In order to achieve your goals you need to nurture yourself, and put yourself first.

Because pursuing big dreams is a marathon, not a sprint. So you need to be in optimal physical and emotional condition to keep at it over time, and to get to the finish line.

How to take care of yourself?

• Self-care is not selfish

One of the first things we need to unlearn as women is the belief that taking care of ourselves is selfish. It’s not. Putting ourselves first is smart. It’s necessary. Even taking care of others works better when we take care of ourselves first. There’s no need to feel guilty, ashamed, or not good enough.

• Self-care can be anything

The media easily associated self-care with spa days, and massages. Or time off in the Sun on a tropical island. Sure, those are great ways to take care of yourself but not the only ones. They’re also costly, and time-consuming which makes it harder to fit them into your life.

If we look passed this limiting picture of self-care a whole world opens up. Self-care can be anything. It can fit into any amount of time on any day of the week. It doesn’t need to cost anything. It can be a phone call to a friend, going to bed early, a babysitter on a Wednesday afternoon, five minutes of stretching in the morning, clothes that fit you perfectly. Self-care is about filling your cup, doing what you need to be nourished, strong, happy.

• Self-care is a practice

Giving yourself some me-time when you’re about to give up or break down is always a good idea. It will help recharge your batteries, and pick you up so you can keep going. But to reap the long-term benefits of self-care, so it can help you achieve your biggest dreams, it needs to be a practice. Something you do regularly, if possible every day.

Over time, five minutes of self-care every day will be life-changing. It will bring you closer to yourself, help you identify your needs, figure out how you operate from the inside out. You’ll learn to recognize when it’s time to focus on yourself, and have plenty of options to choose from.

If you want more Dream Bigger Tips, I’ve got great news for you! This tip is part of a series, you can find all entries here.

Self-care tips for when you’re working hard to build your dream

Self-care didn’t always come naturally to me. In fact, I’d say that for the biggest part of my life I didn’t care much for my body. Or myself. I was too preoccupied with endless to-do lists, multi-tasking to make sure everything got done, and that everyone around me was happy first. Taking care of myself was something I’d do in the future, after all the other stuff I had going on. Of course I never got to that point. How could I make myself a priority when I kept on adding other things to my list first?

When I think back on that time now, I realize I lived my life as if I had no body at all. Everything happened from the top of my head up to my neck. Anything below that was a necessity, not a gift. At least, that’s how I used to look at it.

That doesn’t mean I didn’t exercise, or wasn’t aware of what I was putting into my body. Only I didn’t do it for the right reasons. I slept because I had to, I ate – most days much later than I should have and at my desk – not because I wanted to nourish my body but because I was so hungry I couldn’t ignore my poor body anymore. When I went to the gym it was because I felt I needed to look a certain way to fit in, not because I wanted a strong, healthy body. The thing is, our bodies are amazing machines that can cope with a lot of things, but in order to live a joyful, fulfilling, healthy life we need to do more than just keep ourselves physically alive.

My own decade-long habit of ignoring my body’s needs resulted in heaps of stress, aches and pains, headaches. I wasn’t the nicest person to be around either, especially early in the afternoon when I hadn’t eaten yet and was in full-blown hangry agony. Because of the prolonged hours I spent at my desk behind my laptop I always had cold hands and feet, and a sore neck and shoulders.

But the biggest issue was that I wasn’t nearly as productive as I could have been. Doing almost nothing to work toward my goals. During my work day I was easily distracted, stressed out, unhappy. At night I was exhausted. By not allowing myself to take a break or care for myself I was miserable.

So, what is self-care?

The World Health Organization restricts the meaning of self-care to the practices that keep you safe from disease, boost and restore your health, but in a more general sense, self-care could be defined as taking time to focus on yourself and your physical and psychological needs. It’s about reconnecting with your body to listen to its messages, quieting your mind and dealing with your emotions and feelings.

Is self-care another name for pampering?

Only if your idea of pampering is to give your body (and mind) what it needs to thrive and continue to serve you well in your mission to achieve your dreams.

In recent years, self-care started becoming more popular thanks to the work of self-care activists like poet Audre Lorde.

Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.
– Audre Lorde

The idea is quite simple: if I don’t take care of myself, I won’t be able to keep fighting for the causes I believe in. If I don’t take care of my own needs, I’m not going to be able to help others get what they need either.

You’re a human being, not a robot

Something the South African writer Malebo Sephodi set out to remind people during a TEDx talk was that we need to allow ourselves to feel things. We’re human. We’re not robots designed to work or process information non-stop, and we need to take the time to reflect on who we are, who society expects us to be, and who we feel we should be – what we know is our true calling.

Self-care is an act of love and a tool for strengthening your body and mind. The bigger your dreams or goals, the bigger the risk of becoming overwhelmed, disengaged, or even sick while working hard to achieve them. Because you know that the reward will be so great, you risk pushing yourself too hard.

To help you work toward your big dreams in a meaningful way I’ve put together a list of self-care tips that I invite you to try, and (if you like them) integrate into your daily life. These tips have helped me to finally make friends with my body, and learn to treat myself well.

• Learn to release the tension in your body

You can do this through yoga, getting a massage (or giving yourself one), going to the gym, or even doing breathing exercises. For example, you can install the BreatheWell app on your phone (iOS, Android) and go through a breathing cycle any time you feel tense. You can start with a 4-second inhale, a 16-second hold, and an 8-second exhale.

• Sit on a bench in the park

Or step outside, or to your balcony for a few minutes. Just watch the people and the cars passing by, what’s unfolding around you without thinking about all the things you have to do. This will give your mind and body a relaxing break.

• Take a meditation break

Some people meditate for 2 hours a day, or more. It’s OK if you don’t have that long, 15 minutes or even less will be just as good. If you don’t know how to meditate, open a guided meditation on YouTube and listen to the indications or just focus on your breathing. [If you’re a member of the Big Dreamers Club, simply go through the meditation module Maja Savic created for us.] Meditation can help you live in the present and expand your consciousness, thus freeing you from the shackles of your own thoughts and emotions.

• Clean your desk or your room

Decluttering will make you feel more productive and will also help calm your mind. It’s really worth it to invest 15-20 minutes on cleaning up your workspace or personal space every day.

• Play a simple, mindless game

The awesome thing about games is that they capture your attention, so you can use them to give yourself a break, especially during stressful times. You can play a game on your phone or in your browser. A quick Google search will give you lots of options to choose from. So will asking children or teenagers!

• Make yourself a nourishing meal

It should be something you really want to eat and that’s also good for you. Usually, your body craves what it needs. So listen to it, and don’t postpone eating when you’re hungry, or eat less than your body needs. Remember that food is your body’s (and mind’s) fuel, and that you need it to be happy – and work on your dreams!

• Binge on some Netflix

Or watch a series or fun TV show. It doesn’t matter what you pick, as long as it’s not work in disguise. Don’t go to YouTube to learn more about subjects that matter to you at work, instead make sure to pick something that will amuse you, and will help you get your mind off things.

• Take a nap

Sometimes our bodies and minds need rest. Babies and young children do it often, and it’s easy to see the difference in mood before and after. The same is true for us. Whether it’s 10 minutes or half an hour, laying down to rest and closing your eyes for a little while can truly do wonders. Especially if you live a busy life with little time for yourself.

• Reach out to a friend

You’re not in this alone. Even though when you’re working your way through your to-do list you might feel you are. That’s why taking a break, and reaching out to a friend can do so much good. It doesn’t need to be a long conversation, or even a phone call. You can message a friend on Facebook, or exchange a few text messages through your phone. The point is to connect, and remember that a whole world is out there.

• Close the curtains and dance to your favorite song

Moving your body is one of the best ways to release tension, get some blood flowing through your body, and to remember you’re alive. If you feel up to it, try singing while you’re at it. Expressing yourself through your body can be a great way to get yourself out of the confines of your comfort zone, which in turn will not only boost your health but your creativity too!

• Put your thoughts on paper

Having dealt with anxiety for a big part of my life, I know all too well what it feels like to have too many things swirling in my mind. One trick that I’ve found to be helpful to release some of the mental stress that comes from having too many things in my head, is to write them down on a piece of paper. When I do it – and I’ve made it a habit to do this regularly – I can literally feel space freeing up inside my mind. The result? I’m calmer, less stressed, and I can focus better on what really matters.

If you like any of the tips, I invite you to put them into action. And in the comments below, let me know about it. But whatever you do, remember that you’re not a robot but a soul traveling through this world in a vessel made of flesh and bones. Take care of yourself!